This week but last year 😉 VJ asked us how we approach the new year. Do we do resolutions or is it just another day.
I find her questions quite a synchronicity because I feel in transition to become more me since I left the supermarket nearly a year ago.
One change I am making is that the new year is going to start for me in November, not January. I am not a pagan but in recent years it has felt more and more like there is the true transition to a new year. However, I believe its also an important transition when the calendar changes.
This year(?)/last year I used it the review 2018 and set an intention for 2019. We went to bed early as the best husband (Jeremy Clarkson voice) in the world‘s children were not with us and he had to work on the first. He was snoring peacefully beside me while I send out blessings to many fellow bloggers, family and friends. I had a look through my 2018 goals and was rather happy with what I had achieved. And I thanked the powers that be for all the good I had received in 2018. I believe gratefulness is a superpower and so I hone it as much as I can 😉
Now I am not sure what’s the difference between a resolution and a goal. To me, it feels more concrete to have goals than resolutions. They seem to be too general. If I have a goal I can break it down into different smaller steps which makes it easier to achieve them.
I have learned in 2018 that it is easier for me to get on with stuff when I have a list of tasks and can just follow that list. I have a concrete step, I can take towards my goal so I can shut up the negative committee in my head and get active. Now don’t get me wrong I actually only achieved half of the goals I had. Well, they say man plans and god changes the plan or something of the sort.
That’s why I have never been too bothered about my goal lists. Mine never seemed to have worked out. But looking back that seems to have more to do with the fact that I never believed I am good enough to achieve anything. My self-esteem was incredibly low and if you do not believe in yourself you won’t get anywhere. At least in my experience.
Having had several months without paid work, sorting out my finances, walking the dog daily and becoming more of a homemaker has given me more self-esteem, healing and wellbeing than 20 years of therapy together. No, I fully believe in the merits of therapy of any sort but in the end, you have to figure yourself out because no one else really understands what goes on in that mind of yours or mine in this case. Therapy is like a chemical that induces a reaction but you and the changes you decide to make are the reaction.
Besides walking is powerful when you want to sort yourself out. A previous therapist of mine said that walking seems to make your synapses create new pathways and with that you’ll find new solutions to your problems. And Julia Cameron believes in that too. Her book “Walking in this World” is on my reading this year.
I have trained myself in 2018 to become concrete in what I want to achieve, then break it down into small steps that I can do every day. And it suddenly works. For 2019 I have set my yearly goals, broke them down into monthly and weekly goals and every evening I sit down and write down the steps for the next day.
Does that sound too organised? Maybe. But hey it works for me, doesn’t need to work for you. Feel free to roll with your own rock ;-). Thinking about it though I have changed in that respect too. Just a year ago I would not have felt capable of setting goals and believing I could do it. My negative belief was: “I won’t make it anyway! So why bother!” because that was my experience. And that belief stayed true until I worked with positive affirmations to change that belief.
That is one thing I have come to believe in 2018. Our perception is everything. Our perception of the world and our life is such a powerful thing if we’d all be aware of it we would never think anything negative about ourselves again. But obviously, we are trained so much in the powerlessness of dreams and perceptions that it is hard work to change that. I will work on that for the rest of my life I think.
I start rambling. So what was the question? Do we set resolutions or is the New Year just another day? It’s not just another day but resolutions don’t do it for me. Sorry VJ but that must do 😉
Find VJ’s post here and this is how you can take part:
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